White Flowers

Finding Calm at a Time of Great Sorrow

Phyllis Inspiration 27 Comments

There are weeks where you just can’t seem to understand many things. This is one of those weeks. I have watched with great sorrow the accounts of two more mass shootings in our country.

I want to scream, “Stop it!” I have experienced the loss of friends and family through death, but never through an event like this. My mind can’t comprehend being on the premises when something like this happens and witnessing shootings. It’s hard enough to deal with a death of a loved one, but this—I can’t even begin to imagine.

We are a nation that has lived through many tragedies like this, and we pull together. The days and months following 9/11 were a time of unity and compassion. We reached out to everyone to help bring a little bit of calm to a horrible time.

I look at things on a personal level and try to imagine what went wrong that a person felt shooting others was the answer. Did we miss something? Were we too busy to notice a cry for help? I don’t have the answers. I wish I did.

Please let this serve as an encouragement to you that if you need someone to speak with about a loss or a difficult time in your life, please reach out. Sometimes just sharing with another person lightens the load and brings a little calm in your soul. A moment shared may be the turning point of your life. You are special to someone. You have great worth and great gifts to offer. When discouragement comes, it is only temporary, and it will pass. The passing of time gives us new perspective.

When I have the privilege of speaking at events, most of them women’s events, I close with this thought that I want to share this with you.

Right now, someone is thinking of you.

Someone wants to laugh with you.

Someone wants to hold your hand.

Someone wants to be the shoulder you cry on.

Someone wants to see your smile and hear your voice.

Right now, someone wants to give you a gift,

And someone thinks you are the gift!

Our lives have great worth. Live each day to the fullest, and when the sun goes down, rejoice that we lived another day.

If you need a person to share with and you don’t have anyone, please contact me. I might not have the answer, but I do have a heart that will listen.

Love to you all,


Comments 27

  1. Phyllis dear, your litany of compassion and comfort is just what is needed
    to salve the wounds of these past days. As to the why’s …”The greatest judgement God can give is to let man have his own way…” So many have gone astray demanding that their own will be done …. and look what has been produced without His Spirit’s guidance… a lost and destructive band of the misdirected, cheated of His legacy. For those who know the Way, may their light so shine as to bring on a transformation of those fallen in error to life-affirming conviction and, hopefully, a more merciful judgement.

  2. What difficult times we are living in. We need our faith now, more than ever before.
    Thanks for your thoughts and i loved your “someone thoughts”
    That’s a keeper.

  3. Phyllis~ Thank you for reaching out with such a heart felt, honest post. I want you to know I really look forward to your posts and hope to meet you one day. Your kindness is more of what we need. God Bless!

  4. This,sadly, is an event not just in our country but felt globally. People are angry, frustrated, and filled with hate. This is inline with the prophesy that Jesus gave at 2Timothy 3:1-5. Notice that these personality characteristics would mark a specific time period, the last days. Many things are written in the Bible pertaining to this time period. Jesus said it would be like the days of Noah. These events of mass destruction have become commonplace to many so now they are no more than a shaking of the head. Others feel that God is responsible Notice what has been recorded at Job 34:10. Therefore you men of heart listen to me Far be it for the true God to act wickedly and the Almighty to act unjustly. The Bible does tell us who is responsible at 1John 5:19. We know we originate with god, but the whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one (Satan th e Devil l). Jesus said you would recognize men by their fruits. As we look at the fruitage we see to whom they belong.. There is a wonderful hope ahead however Psalm 37:9-11,29

  5. I wish all of you would come to Southern Lady Celebration here in Birmingham in October. We could have a special Ribbon time together and get to know our Ribbon friends. We need to be together in person one time to strenthen, share our thoughts, and share good things. Think about coming. I would love to meet each of you and spend time with you. All of our speakers will encourage you too. Lori Allen’s testimony of overcoming breast cancer is so inspiring. Jeannie Robertson will make you laugh til you cry. We need each other. These gatherings have changed lives. You all give me courage to carry on on days when I am discouraged. Thank you for investing in me!!!!

  6. Thank you, I feel like we should be such friends should we meet. I am sure there are good things happening if we could hear about it. God is still on control, good wins over evil,everything is going to be alright. Let us rejoice in the Lord and do good right where we are at.

  7. Thank you Phyllis for your beautiful and compassionate words. You are very generous in your offer of help.

    I have stacks of your magazines in my closet and I love to pull out a few from 2014 or whatever year, brew some tea and disappear into a calm relaxing state of mind with pleasant pictures of faraway places and stories about interesting people.
    I find times like that very calming and beneficial to my peace of mind. I don’t want to read of murders and disfunctional lives.

    I rarely watch TV because I can’t even imagine the strange and dark stories that are produced for cable & internet viewing.
    I can not watch such weird and twisted tales. I ask myself often, “what kind of mind can think this up?”
    So, i turn off my TV and reach for my Bible or a cookbook or novel. And I am happy.

    How have we come to this? By removing God from our schools and public squares, adding “anything goes” as a philosophy, we have changed many of our children.
    They are lost souls in search of identity, acceptance and love. They are given legal drugs to solve their anxiety and to sit still in class. They go into dark reclusive lives. They hide indoors and
    do not interact with other people. They don’t even know the names of their neighbors.
    They can’t even tell you how to drive to the dentist because they give all their attention to their smart phones instead of looking out the window.

    My children would play box games for hours and laugh and argue over card games. Then eat dinner and discuss their day at school. But now, in restaurants, kids and parents sit and each one plays with their phone instead of talking.

    We need our schools to go back to the basics instead of gender or diversity classes. Teach home economics and shop
    again. Practical knowledge is no longer thought of as good.

    I find myself wishing for The Brady Bunch and Father Knows Best to come back into our lives.

    Mostly I want God back in our country and our lives, esp. in our children.

    May God bless us and heal our broken ways.

  8. Good words and a very kind and concerned offer of help. I see these evil and horrid mass murders as absolutely no respect or regard for a human life. A human life created in the image of God. Yet we can’t say that in America anymore, can we? The majority of America has abandoned God, thrown Him out of schools, government, community, colleges, higher learning, every aspect of life that not all that long ago; some knowledge of Him was commonplace. As atrocious as these mass shootings and now stabbings are, the biggest atrocity in numbers and beyond evil is the MASS abortions. When a ” dr. ” who has pledged to do everything to save a life rips a baby apart limb by limb AS they are being born, just before they are born, or kill them on a table AFTER they are born… and THIS is legal… why are we shocked by these atrocities. We are shocked because we haven’t been desensitized yet and because some of us follow Christ, some still have a conscience, a sense of decency, morality. I believe God is taking His hands off America, the world, giving us what the majority want. ” For everyone to do what is right in their own eyes” no Creator to tell them how to live, “because men loved darkness rather than light”. “And God gave them over to a reprobate mind” Many might think this negative, gloom and doom. I say it is reality and may we repent asking God for forgiveness and mercy. O! America…

  9. Phyllis, You are such an inspiration to so many. Please know your work, your thoughts, your writings are such gifts to so very many people. You make a huge positive difference; we are so very grateful- and blessed.
    Nancee Stewart

  10. The shooting which took place at n OH was very disturbing. I live about 2 miles from the young man and his family in Bellbrook, OH.

    One has to wander what causes these terrible things to happen. To take the life of your own sister and what is supposed to be your best friend is incomprehensible to me.

    My sincere prayers and sympathy go out to his parents and all of the parents and spouses who may have lost loved ones. May God hold you in His arms and the prayers and concerns of loved ones sustain you in this time of tremendous sadness and grief.

    God Bless

  11. I wonder at times such as the past week and think what is happening. Yes, after 9/11 the country came together and it felt good, in spite of the horror. We were a united country.
    Would you have any objections to my copying your thoughts and write down in my journal?
    I would like you to know that there are times your blog has given me inspiration

    1. Please do. I hope that together we can find the good that remains in our country. God is in control and while we do not understand the evil, we know He is more powerful than any evil thing that happens.

  12. Phyllis, I am so touched and moved by your heart felt words in this touching post. Thank You for sharing your special feelings and thoughts. God Bless.

  13. Phyllis you are a special lady. Your beautiful words and kindness is what we need more of today. God Bless you.

  14. Your comments and extremely generous offer are incredible, Phyllis. Yes, we need to reach out and yes, we need to listen. But I also believe we need to look into what is causing this particular demographic of our society to partake in such horrible acts of violence. Up here in Toronto, Canada, while we didn’t have the mass shootings…in the last few days we have had almost twenty individual different gun related injuries and deaths, an alarming up tick.We need to start nurturing these young men whether through religion or education, we need to take the stigma away from mental health, and perhaps provide solid mentorship and promote self worth.

  15. Actually there were THREE shootings. I know the one in Gilroy, CA did not have as many victims, but those who died and those affected will bear scars just as deep as those in TX and OH.

  16. These calming, comforting and caring words are so needed in our caustic world. God’s Love is felt through your kind words. Thank you.

  17. Lovely sentiment! I totally understand wanting to scream Stop It. I’ve got a wonderful support network but I’ll remember that you offered also. We need more kind people in the world

  18. Beautiful! I think we all should be saying “Stop it” until we are heard. We should not be living in fear. Be cautious and move forward together will all peace-keeping people.

  19. Thank you so much for these comments and your personal reflections. We need to near these words over and over to combat the dark times.
    Help us to find calm in the storm.

  20. I can not understand why so many people have no regard for human life. It seems like most of the horrible killings are committed by young-ish white males. If only someone could figure out what in our society is causing this. I for one, think this could be my last day alive almost every time I leave my home. It’s a sad commentary on our country/world today. Seems like all we can do is pray.

  21. What a wonderful response to a horrific time in our country. Thank you for the sweet words of hope, love and compassion. I pray our nation can turn to God for healing and guidance. It is so needed!! Love and hugs to you.

  22. God bless you Phyllis for your time and attention to the evil that is consuming our nation. Your closing comments are what is not talked about in our schools and churches. When we remove God’s teaching from our schools and the court house square, we turn to the things of the human mind and make things that were good into things that are evil and things that were evil into thing that are good. God help us.

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