Too often in life we become overly concerned about a situation that we cannot affect the outcome of. You know what I mean! Your ideas and thoughts are much better that the route being taken, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter.
I was grimacing one day about a change coming that no longer involved me, yet I had concerns. My dear friend held up three fingers and said, “Remember this?” The three fingers mean, “Not My Problem!” Wow, that was freeing to hear. Not My Problem…and I realized that no matter how I fretted, there was nothing I could do or say to change the decision that had been made.
Not My Problem. Interesting thought. And you know, my friend was absolutely right! It was most certainly not my problem. So freeing, so liberating, and so accurate. How many times do we “borrow trouble,” as my grandmother used to say. We get emotionally involved in situations that are outside of our sphere of influence. Yet when we know those involved and can see a train wreck on the horizon, we can’t help but be interested.
I am always open to listen when anyone has a problem, and when they need to vent or share. Sometimes it helps to have someone to talk to. I can always give ideas for possible solutions, but at the end of the day, I know the decisions that need to be made are not mine.
Sometimes when I fret over a situation, Neal will be the one to hold up three fingers! I am quickly reminded that it is Not My Problem. It is also freeing to hold up those three fingers to someone when they are trying to drag you into a conversation or situation where you don’t belong.
It is setting boundaries for ourselves, isn’t it? We can lose many nights of sleep worrying about things that we simply cannot change. We toss and turn, flip the pillow, and then ultimately wear ourselves out over a situation that is not ours. Truly, this stems from how deeply we care about these people.
But, remember the three fingers! Not My Problem. You will find a smile will be on your face, and you will sleep better knowing your limitations and involvement into a situation that’s not yours.